Your Choice Your Love

Went out whole day with Sean, it's really one of the best days in my life. Thank you for him willing to spend so much time with me. My feeling for him is getting stronger and stronger. Love you~

Recently I got to know two lovely couples and listening their stories made me think a lot. One is Straight couple together for 30 years, and one is Gay couple together for 20 years. Both couples also from Taiwan. Of course their stories and advice only for references not guidlines, because every couple has different way to sustain the relationship.

Gay couple is Kevin Tsai (蔡康永 - writer & TV host) and his partner, you can google to know more about him. He is one of the celebrities that I love so much. He is not good looking, but his talent his attitude and thinking of life are very impressive. At Asian country, it's quite hard a gay couple being accepted and make people jealous of their long lasting relationship. They made it.

The common thing they shared about secret of long lasting relationship, is think about why you chose that person at the first place. We can change partner easily, but we have to pay out many things at the same time. Maybe we feel the "freshness" of new partner, but put ourselves as outsider, is it really what you want??  Chose who you love, and love who you chose.

At the beginning, don't put all hopes on the partner, the good qualities of that person are not forever there, we need to sustain it together, and deal with the changes. Some people say it's not good to try change your partner, but is it really true? " 80% of people think a person has changed, but they just didn't know what he/she actually was. "

Imagine you have been with your partner for 20 years, do you think some changes of that person still not good? Some changes is alright, bad or good still let you know what's the best for each other, just don't keep demanding for changes and yourself also not willing to change.


"[Enjoy] is more precious than [Own]. We [enjoy] air, but can't [own] air, we [enjoy] the sunlight, but can't [own] the Sun. Similarly, we [enjoy] friendship and family, but no way and also can't think to [own] friend and family. We also [enjoy] Love, but we can't try to [own] the lover. Just enjoy it, [Enjoy] really more precious than [Own]."

"You want to own your lover? However, you can own what from him? His sickness? His scars? You can own his memories? None of them you can, so you still want to own what? Just loving each other is enough."

"You feel so alive and happy when truly loving a person, this is the best gift you can get from love. Hence, how much love he can give back to you doesn't really that important anymore." 

I guess we all hope there is the one we can holding hand together till end. 

O.M.G.! Hottest Hunks and Shock

The Hottest Hunks in Malaysia 2013/14 has finalisted to 30 contestants. As usual, I went to check the look of all hunks ; )

What I didn't expect...there are more than 2 out of 30 contestants are from MY GYM!!!! I was a bit shocked when browsing through the photos. Most importantly, my EX-CRUSH ALSO on it!!! Just in case you don't know, something happened between me and him >> Kill Me!!

Well, being at the same gym for so many months, of course I know they definitely qualified to join this competition. They really got gorgeous bodies that can die for. My ex-crush got the face too.

No wonder that they worked so freaking hard recently, especially their abs. Always pull up their clothes in front of mirror after abs exercise, checking their 6 packs!!! I also want T.T

However, their photos taken so badly, in real person they all look better, especially ex-crush. Almost can't recognize him..bad photograhper. I also didn't expect he is Younger than me!! I always think he is slightly older. =.="

*Clear throat* Confession: Since I know his name, so you know can try to find him out of curiousity..LOL Then, BOMB!!!! We have mutual friends =.=" OMG!!!!!! Another shock for me, I can't imagine what if I bump into him with my friend along since that incident. Awkwardness to the MAX!!!!! T.T

Not going to reveal who is he or who are them. Just have a look~ Enjoy!!!

My favourite is Yuchi Goh now ; )

HUNKS!!!!!!  In Chinese but visual thing is universal ; )

Waiter or Cumer

Not going to talk about anything link with sexual thing or restaurant (erm...a lil bit). I'm talking about punctuality in any social event, and which role mostly you are??

Waiter, the one who always wait others to come Or Comer, the one who being waited for his/her arrival. Since I was born until now, my fate is to be a waiter.

I always the one wait people to come for meet up, so now I can consider myself very patient person (except driving on the road...lol) I just use to wait people come, and always prepare something to spend on my waiting time. Waited for 2 hours? nothing special for me. Highest record.....4 hours??

Actually, not just about punctuality, sometimes I have to wait not because that person not punctual, just she/he got things to do first. After I met Sean, again as a fated waiter, I always the one waiting his arrival.

Not that he is late, just I'm too free and early...lol He has to go gym after work, so it takes some times for him to meet me for dinner. On the other hand, I try to avoid go gym at peak hours, so I always go early and finish everything, then start waiting him.

When you have own thing to do, the time you waiting the person not that bad. Sometimes it makes you do something always say no time, like reading book!!!! or searching useful material on internet (since public wi-fi so slow, can't load video) also will get bored of those social media and games.

So you are wait-er or cum-er? ;)

Having a nice tea while waiting =)

Him, His & He..Sayhi

When I first saw Him, I felt so shocked about His gorgeous face, and He is Alex Sayhi..LOL Don't get me wrong, I still love Sean more. xD

Alex Sayhi..I found him when I was surfing the internet, and came across a blog shared about this guy. You may not find him hot or good looking, but I like that kind of face features. I hardly like Caucasian, but he caught my attention ; ) His name also quite catchy and easy to remember =)

Ohhh god...I melted~

He is a French model, while also a martial artist, professional acrobat and actor ; ) OMG..so talented!!! Some people say he got Asian bloodline, but still not sure abotu it. I think he got because he doesn't look like typical French and also has a bit Asian features (A bit la).

Talk less and pics time!!!! xD (Oh! He has intagram and twitter account, just google it ; )

Voices for Friend with Benefit

Read the post from soulchild about friend with benefit, it's a good writing, and he and I have been discussed this topic before. I just want to add another few points about this topic.

No doubt that some people confuse or abuse the term friend with benefit (FwB), but some are just too afraid of being in this kind of relationship. You can't deny it's quite hard to handle the boundary between FwB and boyfriend. Some just don't know how to handle, and make the other party thinks he is just abusing..

To be fair, you spend one month with a dog, already can formed emotional attachement, so don't tell me it's very easy to handle, when you as human spending time with a gender you born to be attracted, and somemore sex is involved. Highly Emotional people (*slowly raising up hand*) tend to easily fall for that guy or confuse about the relationship.

Tight tight Formal Shirt~ ; )

Finally got call for job interview, after sent many resume T.T  It's at KL centre, and puctuality me of course reached there an hour early..lol  I waited at the lobby first since still early.

It was lunch time, so many people walking around, and OMG so many hot guys with formal shirt!!! *Formal Shirt Fetish Activated!!!!!* The building got 40 floors, so imagine HOW many guys (don't care about female) walking up and down!!!

I was totally melted whne few super hot guys walk-passed me, and their nice bodies make the formal shirt looks a bit tight. Oh! Orgasm~ However, there is limit for it, I saw an hot daddy walking and GOSH his shirt like super tight like going to explode and shoot out the buttons.

Not sure really got no bigger size, or he chose to wear like that =.= To be honest, it doesn't look really nice. A bit tight which can see and know you got hot body, but if too tight..erm..Sir you need new shirt.

Okay! After 30 mins, wiped my drool and went upstairs for interview. I was hoping my interviewer is hot, but I didn't expect he looks like my EX!!!!!!!!! WTF! =.=

Same eyes same face shape voice quite similar....what a coincidence. Nevermind, the way he spoke get rid of my thought, FYI he is straight! I can sense that. My interview was more than 2 hours..Oh dear..did many personality tests and wrote essay for english test. *Tired*

Then, I went dinner with Sean, he also wearing formal shirt too, normally he already changed to casual outfit. His body also make the shirt looks a bit tight..*blush blush* Nice ; )

That daddy was tighter than this one!!!! 

 Thin guy also can wear it nice, just need slim fit cutting!!!

 

 

 

This one nice ; )

 

 



Aww...melted~


Loved Me

Do you remember

We were holding hand

Looking at the same sky

Talking about our future

Do you remember
One night you held my hand
And kissed my forehead
Saying how much you love me

 

Don't know since when

We are looking at different skies

And I am no longer

Part of your future
 

Don't know since when

The person who loving me so much

Now trying to find a reason

To walk out my life
 

All the reasons
You can think of
Like needles poke into
My heart that loving you
 

But do you know

All I want just hear you say

You loved..loved

loved me

That's all I want to know

 

Inspired by few posts in a forum, talking about their heart broken stories. They really touched my heart and I can feel their pain. Being in a relationship, I understand how heart broken it is when you end with him, especially not ended peacefully.

Sometimes, when bf wants end it, all he want is at least the bf truly loved him. Perhaps it can make him feels less pain.

However, I am very glad that some of them moved on, though some still struggling to get out from it, but at least they started to try. Many still haven't lost hope about gay relationship =)

 

Leg Day Please!!! Please!!!

I think some of you have noticed before, a hot guy walking towards you, his body is so nice, big chest big arm and wide shoulder...BUT when you look downward..OMG his legs like two sticks!!!

To me, the guy's hotness definitely becomes lower, the contrast kind of turn me off. I have seen many guys at my gym, all very nice upper body but looking their legs, I can know how skinny and thin (upper body) they were.

I know some guys decide to just focus on upper body first then only work on legs, but seriously doesn't look really nice. I used to neglect my legs, but trainer and friends said must include leg day every week. Plus, Sean also said my thigh so....small and pathetic. His thighs are big!! Shocked O.O when I first saw his thigh.

I believe you can work our body parts separately in different days every week, so your whole body progress looks nicer, as in not just upper body became bigger.

 

 

 

 Hmm....both also consider okay??

This one overall quite balance

 

 





Nice one ; )

Unprotected

Yes..you may have known what am I going talk about - unprotected sex.

It happened quite long ago, but I think I need to share it, so people can take it seriously and be more careful. Still remember one of my sex buddies..daddy? Yup, he has broken my trust to him.

That night, as usual I went his place for getting off. That time he seemed bigger, muscles more solid and abs coming out, totally turn me on. I could see he must trained very hard and for his age quite impressive.

Then, foreplay...blah blah blah. During halfway of the session, I suddenly noticed got a rubber kind of thing aside. I took it and found it was a condom. Only realized, he took it off halfway.

I asked him whether he really did or replace another? He said it's okay, I was clean so he dared to take it off...BUT I was not sure you are clean or not!!!!!!!! (I know he is very active one) Don't know why, I didn't have the strength to stop everything, maybe I scare of awkwardness if I did that....felt terrible for myself after he finished everything.

That was the time, made me realized how dangerous it's even he is a regular or sex buddy. I have known him for almost half year yet he broke my trust. I never expected this, since I thought people who play wild, should be more caution about it. In reality, it's not like that, once you started become wild, the risk always there!!

After that, it was my blood test journey started, I really scare about it. Went with a friend to have a speed test from NGO. The moment when the girl asked me what am I going to do if I diagnosed HIV? Totally freak me out!!!

Second time, Sean went with us (told him everything), kind of gave me support. Actually, he also wanted to test..lol Third test is coming soon, I hope everything will be okay. Sean keep saying don't worry too much. Really glad that I met you!! <3 =)

Those who having wild life, please play safe and be more alert to those you playing with, even though you have known him quite some times.  Don't  let your guard down and get yourself in trouble.

Protected first!!!

The End with Him

All your sweet talks

Became knives cutting my heart

Piece by piece

Holding hand together forever

Already like nigtmare to me

That I will never dream of

 

Your scent Your voice Your everything

Became scars in my heart

That I can never forget
Unitl I die

 

All the promises you made

Became broken glass pieces

And my hands are full of blood

By collecting all those pieces

 

From Heaven to Hell! Help!!! T.T

Today supposed to be a wonderful day, but I ruined it very badly!!!!!!!

Cut it short. Recently, I got new haircut, everyone says it's nice and looks good. Then, when I was at gym, my ex crush finally smiled and said Hi to me!!!!!! After 8 Months at gym!!!!! He is the super A grade kind of guy. Fair and smooth skin...white teeth..red lips and super hot body!! but my friends said he is a bit too muscular la. I showed them long time ago.

Then, don't know why stupid me tried to take photo of him again, and he noticed it!!!!!!!! T^T I'm 90% sure he knows it because look back the photo, he totally stared at my phone and my stupid posture also quite obvious!!!!!!! *Got hole to hide my head??*

Moreover, I think he sort of told his one friend (huge group of them) When he looked at me again, no smiling face at all!!! OMG!!!! How am I going to survive at gym for the rest of the time! T.T

If just him knows is okay, but whole bunch of guys knowing totally can kill me. Plus, I also always alone at the gym. No body supports me T.T Sean teased and laughed at me first, then console me lor.

I'm the kind of really care how people think about me. Guess I need to change it now. T.T