I Was Wrong

Forgot about my blog for so long, I have been busying with work. I really slowly getting married with work, everyday spend almost 13 hours at work. Ya..I think I know why I became like this.

It's a month plus after Sean, but I feel like it has been so long ady. I know in the previous post, I seems like almost can move on for better. However, I realized actually I still not really moved on, and maybe not ready to open my heart for anyone.

Well, I kind of back to the scene that I used to be..ya slut. LOL However, surprisingly I didn't meet up with anyone because either people not interested or I'm not interested. We all are so picky..haha

I able to talk with few guys, and some are just not match or can't hold the conversation for long. Only one guy until now still talking with him, let's called him James.  Everytime I feel so happy and comfortable talking to him, and keep chatting for hours and hours. He is not really my type, but we are in same wavelength, which allows us to talk non-stop.

 Nonetheless, I realized I still haven't moved on, I pretend I don't miss Sean, but actually I still miss him and don't have an empty space for someone. Sometimes I also confuse with my feelings. Am I ready? Am I just finding replacement? Am I just want someone for the sake of want relationship and love?

I know I should take everything slow to clear my mind and understand my true feelings. That's why I trying to keep distance with James but still keep in touch. I don't want to hurt anyone, and it's unfair for him when I don't know what's my true feelings.

Hence, I just randomly bought an air ticket, because feel like fly to somewhere far away to clear my mind and breath in some fresh air. Going to plan everything nicely since it is quite close to the departure date now. Plus, it is first time travel alone so a lot things need to know.

Recently, addicted to this song and movie..

我還踮著腳思念，
我還任記憶盤旋，
我還閉著眼流淚，
我還裝作無所謂。
我好想你，好想你，
卻欺騙自己。